Sunday, September 14, 2008
It Must Just Suck to be You
Ever wonder what possesses a person to try and make someone else's life miserable? I have a theory. I believe most of the time it's just plain old jealousy. You envy someone. You wish you could be them and then since it's obvious that you can't be them, you get pissed and so do whatever is in your power to try and make their life suck. I'm not sure if that's what's going on in my life now or what but it's obvious that someone wants to hurt me and my family. Because of them we now have a difficult situation we're facing and it's all ridiculous. Some of the people involved are acting hypocritically even while they accuse others of it and everyone involved is emotional. It's not fun. My husband could go to jail. If that happens I'm not sure what will happen with my schooling. I would probably have to stop. This may be exactly what the person wants to happen. It's an odd thing, jealousy. See, it eats at you and inspires you to do things that you normally wouldn't do. Once you do them it's too late, even if you come to your senses and realize what everyone else already knows, that whatever pain you cause won't change your life for the better. You'll still be the same sad, weak person that you always have been and eventually the people you hurt will recover and they may even find out it was you who hurt them (that is, if they don't already know.) That in and of itself may turn out quite badly for you, depending on how angry they are and how far their sphere of influence reaches. I don't know who started this whole ball rolling but I do know this; God is in control and I trust Him. I love my husband and this changes nothing. I will continue with school no matter how long it takes and we will reach our goals together. It may require relocating or cutting off ties but whatever it takes, I'm sure I can do it and still be okay. All I can say is this, "It isn't easy being me, but it must just suck to be you."